Monday, May 2, 2011
what can I do??
As I sit here writing this Brooke is screaming in her high chair. She hasn't eaten anything I have made for days. She has always been terrible with food but she started to get better and now in the last week and a half it seems she is worse than ever. All she ever wants to eat is milk, cheese, gold fish, any treats, Nutri-grain bars, fruit and a few vegetables. If I only gave her these things she would never have a problem eating food. The problem is, is that she is 3 and I think she should eat whatever we are eating and if she doesn't want it then she can eat nothing. Brooke happens to be just about the most stubborn headed girl I know though, and not eating to her is a very viable option. She will wait until I break down and give her one of "her" items. I try not to, but when she's around friends who are eating something or you have a party it seems like it is so much easier to just give her the other items to avoid the huge fit she will through if I try to get her to eat what we are having. I am a very consistent with her and food so I thought we would have broken this cycle but it just seems impossible. I am at my wits end. She doesn't eat, it makes me want to hurt her. She asks for something and I make it and then she says no she doesn't want it before even trying it. If I force her to eat it, her mind is already made up and she will gag and through it up. I just want to cry and have someone fix her. 99% of the time that I am upset with Brooke it is about food. Help me! I need any suggestions we have tried just about everything I can think of; positive reinforcement, sitting until she eats it all, not giving her any food until she eats what we gave her the first time.etc....I really can't handle this any more. AHHHHH.
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5 comments:
Natalie- I wish I had a magic answer to fix this problem but all I have is empathy. I have 2 little girls that do this exact thing. I still haven't figured it out. So I guess just know you are not alone in this very frustrating stage of life. You are an amazing mother so don't be too hard on your self.
Hi Natalie,
I can really feel your frustration through your words and I'm so sorry she's being such a stinker.
My advice is just to give her the list of foods that she likes. It sounds like she'll eat something from every nutritional category. I know it sounds ideal if they just eat what we eat, but I don't think that works for some kids.
All of my kids have been picky eaters. I especially had trouble with Frannie who only wanted to eat carbs, cheese, and salty meats like sausage and bacon. She has always been on the skinny side so the fact that she wouldn't eat "good" food really drove me nuts. And yes got me angry too!
At six years old she is much much better and the food thing is more of an issue with the younger two. Adam has a major sweet tooth and begs me for candy, Ovaltine, apple juice and gum constantly. He eats strawberries one after the other until they are all gone from the green baskets. Natalie pretty much only wants bottles of milk and I have to make sure to not just absentmindedly fill up her bottle all day long when she asks. I think one of the most nutritional foods is eggs, so if you can get her to eat some eggs then that would be good. I make my kids a little scrambled egg and cheese burrito in the morning. Maybe she would like that? Or a little 1 egg omelete?
As long as Brooke has good energy levels, is sleeping well, has regular BMs with a good consistency/color, and good skin color then she is healthy and I would leave her alone. As she grows she will expand her preferences.
Another idea is to plant a garden this year. Especially cherry tomatoes. Kids are more likely to try stuff that they've grown and the cherry tomatoes they can just try right off of the plant.
You are welcome to come over here and let her watch what Karston has to do to eat-it may or may not help.
The rule at our house is that the boys have to try 1 bite of everything on their plates. If they don't like it, then they need to say "no thank you" after having the bite. Because we can't just let them not eat their food we then make something that I know they will eat, that is nutritional. Sometimes they have to go to time out until they are ready to try the bite, but even with their stubbornness they eventually come out of their room and eat.
I'm so sorry that you are having to deal with this-it's definitely a huge frustration that we have been dealing with off and on the last little bit.
Hey Nat I totally know the feeling and am at my wits in all the time. The last couple of weeks we have started this thing with Parker, called "Parker's good choice chart". Every time Parker makes a good choice he gets to put a sticker on the chart. You can put how ever many boxes you want. I have five boxes in a row and probably 10 lines. Each time he fills up a row he gets to pick out something from a "treasure box" which has candy and toys in it. When the whole chart gets filled he gets to go to chucky cheese. Maybe you can try to make an eating chart for Brooke. When Brooke makes good eating choices she gets to put stickers on her chart. When she doesn't make good eating choices she has a sticker taken off. I don't know if that will help but it's been doing wonders with Parker. He loves to watch his chart get full. Hope all is well with you guys! Love ya lots, Ash
Oh my beautiful children!! They are so darling, and I cannot believe Preston is one already and such a blondie! So darling. This food thing is absolutely normal and SOOOOOOO frustrating. Kennedy is still in this stage, though I see little glimpses of hope shining through. She is now saying, I think I'll try just a little. It is incredibly frustrating. Someone taught me: tell them to have a "no thank you bite" of everything you put on their plate. I don't love the phrase, but it gets it done. One suggested singing a song and making a BIG deal when they eat their entire plate of food, clapping, the works. That works sometimes. Lastly, a friend told me to put a bit of everything on the plate, but always include something you know they will eat, some carb, flavorless meat, something to go along with their no thank you bites. I totally get your frustration. I swear at Kennedy some days she makes me so mad. They are just trying to show their independence and ability to make a decision. The first of many future battles my friend. Good luck! Once I accepted it, I became less frustrated overall....but frustration level also goes along with how my day is going. Sorry :(
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